Jigsaw Pieces
by Tawnyblood
Summary: They seem to fit... in some weird and messed up way, but at least they fit together right? A collection of Hetalia short stories.
1. Very Special Agents

_AN: Too much NCIS. Such a freakin' good show and I'm sorry (somewhat) about neglecting my writing duties. New series this is. No set update schedule (when do my stories have one anyways?), but it's just a collection of one- or two-shots. Not like Untitled. Tt's not in chronological order, different time periods, characters, settings, etc._

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**|Very Special Agents|**

Warnings: AU. France, England, Alfred. Fake!USUK, no real pairings. Human names used.

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"There's really something wrong with you." He commented offhandedly, his high-pitched voice cutting through the heavy silence of the psychiatrist's office. He looked through his glasses at his partner, a small smile on his face as he watched that annoyed and flustered look on the other's face. "I mean seriously? You're afraid of _butterflies_?" Alfred lets out a loud laugh at Arthur's attempt to push him over.

The slighter framed man lets out a huff of breath as he crosses his arm over his chest, eyes looking to the side. "I was climbing up a ten story building's _ladder_. The butterfly was flying towards my _eyes_. I could have fell!" Arthur snapped, digging deeper into his chair. He looked at Alfred in confusion, unaware of why he was snickering until he remembered. He didn't answer the question. "I am _not_ afraid of butterflies!" He slugged Alfred for the American was about to laugh again.

His lips pushed into a pout and Alfred rubs at his sore arm. His hand disappears into his heavy jacket, built to fight off the cold of this year's winter, and his blue eyes dart to the side. A small smile blooms on his lips as he pulls out his phone. "You're afraid of butterflies." Alfred states confidently, smile growing bigger as he surfs through his phone's videos. A small 'Ah' escapes his lips and he shoves the screen into Arthur's face, blue eyes sparkling manically.

Arthur watches himself, a close up of his face. He sees the cup of coffee in his hand and suddenly wishes that murder wasn't a crime. Seriously, it was Alfred. Can't they make an exception for him? He ignores the sniggers from the man sitting next to him and watches as his recorded-self screams like a man caught _in the act_, the loud and obnoxious digital laughter of Alfred, the coffee cup flying up with its contents splashing all over the place, and the butterfly peacefully fluttering off of Arthur's hand.

Oh technology? How can _anybody_ ever live without you?

"Let technology show you the truth!"

"I thought it was a bee! You know that I'm allergic to them!"

"How the hell did you think that was a bee?" Alfred barked out, voice unnecessarily loud. "You're just afraid of butterflies okay? Let's let the people decide." He sang as he waved around his phone like it was a magic wand.

Arthur stared at him in confusion, the last words flying over his head before one of them hit him in the face. And then the others crammed themselves into his mouth. "I, uh, wha, git, wait, what?" He stammered out, emerald eyes large and unmoving, clearly unnerving Alfred who shuffled away from his partner.

Who had a gun.

"You're not going to post that on Youtube."

Alfred shrugged, leaning away as Arthur leaned into his personal bubble, huge eyebrows looking more and more menacing the closer he got. Alfred lets out a nervous chuckle, carefully moving the phone farther away from his partner.

And then he pounced, an angry slur of American and British slangs and vulgarities. Alfred let out a loud squeal of 'manly' fright as Arthur's knee came down too close to his _vital regions_ and the Brit stretched for the cell phone that was _just_ out of reach.

"You wanker! Give me that!"

"Arthur, you're hurting me! I can't breath!"

"Give me that damned phone!"

"Rape! Rape! Murder! Bloody Sunday! Nine-eleven! HELP!"

"Oh wow… you two have deeper issues then we discussed on the phone." Both men stopped in their scuffle, looked up to the new voice, red rushing up to their necks and faces. The psychiatrist smiles amiably at them, pushes back a wavy golden lock of his hair from his face as his blue eyes watch the detectives compose themselves.

Arthur was the first to regain his voice. "O-On the phone?" He questions, eyes avoiding the two blue gazes trained onto him.

Francis laughs, a calm kind of noise as he claps his hands together and moves over to his chair. "Aren't you the _darling_ couple who called me about marriage counseling?" He questioned, his eyes watching them with amusement. _It's not often I get a couple this cute._ The therapist mused to himself as the Brit seemed absolutely horrified at the notion of being married to his partner.

"C-Couple? Are you on any drugs? Crack? Extacy? How about a hallucinogen?" Arthur snapped, face steadily growing redder and redder. From the embarrassment or the sheer prosperity of the thought, he didn't know. He swallowed thickly, mind racing, ready for more chiding when the Frenchman just laughed. "We're—"

"It's all right."

"Wha—"

Alfred shocked Arthur into silence with the loving gaze directed at him. He was positive now. Both of those blondes were doing drugs illegally. Can he leave now? And maybe get a new partner too? _Probably not._ He concluded as Alfred drapes his arm over his shoulders and tugs him into the broader chest. "We're in a safe place here Iggy, baby. We can be ourselves here."

Arthur pushed him away when he tried to get a kiss. Alfred pouts at him before shrugging, a carefree smile on his face as he looks at Francis. "Just got back from London. It's pretty over there you know. Ever saw Big Ben?"

"Oh… I saw a _Big Ben_ before…" Francis responds, tipping his head to the side as a lecherous smirk comes to his face. Arthur noticed that lewd look sent his way as Francis says, "Though I have an _Eiffel Tower_ souvenir from my time in France." The Brit forces down the chills that wanted to shake his body like an earthquake. God, he handles with guns, murders, and creeps on a daily basis. It's his _job description_ for God's sake, he can handle a… creepy Frenchman.

A really creepy Frenchman.

_Very_ creepy.

He shakes his head to clear those equally disturbing thoughts and pulls out his badge, flashing it to Francis. "We're not that couple, but we do have a few questions for you. N-C-I-S." He stated as he flips his badge close and slips it back into her coat. "Special agents Kirkland," He motions to himself, "and Jones," He jerks his head at Alfred who cheerfully waved at the other therapist.

"We're _very_ special agents." Detective Jones added with a million-watt smile that could burn out the sun as Detective Kirkland simply rolls his eyes, but he couldn't disagree with that statement. Very special agents indeed…


	2. So Great to be Prussian

_AN: Archery is pretty fun... besides the fact that my aim wasn't worth bear scat. Hurts like a freakin' bitch when the string snaps against any part of your body. Trust me. Classmate showed me a bruise she got. It was sooo not pretty. xD Just learned that my classmate punched a bee to death. Don't know how to react to that._

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**So Great to be Prussian**

Warnings: AU. Prussia, Canada. PruCan. Human names used.

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"MOTHER FUCKING!" The tall man heaved in a deep breath, one hand clutching at his arm. He stared down at the ground, his bangs hiding his tearing eyes from few as he chewed on his bottom lip, fighting the pain that was finally subsiding in his arm. _Deep breathes, deep breathes…_ He told himself in his mind as he took in another heaving breath (which looked more like a desperate gasp for air in Matthew's opinion), and looked at the bruise on his arm.

Matthew leaned forward, stared at the purple expanse of Gilbert's forearm before looking at the bow and arrows thrown to the ground. _He just doesn't listen._ He shook his head before lightly grabbing Gilbert's arm for closer inspection. _Argh…_ He gently twisted the arm to the side, didn't miss the faint hiss of pain. _It looks like he fell from a ten-story building and landed on his arm._ "I'm going to get the arm guard, okay?"

"No! That's so… I can _do_ this!"

Matthew stopped halfway, looked over his shoulder at the very prominent wound before rolling his eyes. He continued over to the equipment manager. "I rather have you be able to do _this_ without internal bleeding." He turned back to the small Asian handling the equipment, didn't need to say anything and was just handed the arm guard with a sympathetic look.

He sighed.

With the grace of a nurse or a doctor, the blonde quickly fastened the guard onto Gilbert who was pointedly looking away. He gave it a light pat before picking up the Prussian's bow and arrow. "Remember to bend your elbow a bit and twist it first." He chided, a furrow in his eyebrows as he stepped back, Gilbert raising the bow and aiming.

He let it free, the string snapping back into place, and the arrow flying… flying… and flying over the target. Matthew bowed his head, a smirk on his face as Gilbert's face remained stoic. The albino rubbed the side of his face, fingers running over the bandage there before turning to Matthew.

"So… how many points is that?"

"Let's just say that if there was a bear charging at us… I'm using you as a human shield."

Gilbert turned back to the target, tongue prodding at the inside of his cheek as he mused over what he just heard. "I'll take that as no points." He said at last, heard the whistle, and went to pick up his arrows. Most of which never even made it to the target, let alone touch it.

Well, he tried at least…

He made it back, set his arrows back into the tackle and placed a hand onto his hip. "This is…" The older man trailed off, unsure of what to say about his archery lessons. Or skills. He scratched his hair, one red eye narrowing in thought. "This is interesting."

"I think it's pretty funny from a spectator point of view."

"Oh shut up."

"And you keep complaining about how I don't vocalize enough during sex." He let out a nervous giggle when his lover gave him _that look_. The one that says that he went a bit too far and that he should shut up now before somebody breaks down crying. Usually Alfred, but it can apply to anybody. He shrugged sheepishly, a small knit in his brows. "N-Not something I should say in public. Sorry."

Gilbert gave the younger male one more glare before it abruptly softened and he let out a soft laugh. He picked up one arrow, strung it, and pulled the string taut. One quick breathe to steel his nerves and he aimed.

"You're Prussian, you can do this."

"Damn right I'm Prussian. I'm awesome… I can do this." He mumbled. He licked his lips, chided himself on being so Goddamn nervous. _Geez when was the last time you were sweating this much?_ He blinked. _Oh yeah… last night._ And then Gil released the string.

Both men watched and tipped their heads to the side as the arrow smacked against the Styrofoam target's handle, bounced some feet into the air before doing a nosedive into the earth. Gilbert scratched his head, looked at Matthew.

"Does that usually happen?"

"Um… no." Matthew pushed up his slipping glasses before picking up another arrow and handing it to Gil. "Try that again." He asked, a shy smile on his lips. "Just without the '_I'm Prussian so I'm awesome_' pep talk."

Gilbert tried again and both watched in silence as the arrow flew way off target. Matthew slowly picked up another arrow and handed it over to his boyfriend and hopefully his camping buddy for the trip. "Try again? But with the '_I'm Prussian so I'm awesome_' pep talk."

Gil shot again and both men watched, wondering about Gilbert's archery skills as the arrow passed through the tiny space between the edge of the target and the top of the handle. He pressed a rough hand to his mouth, one white eyebrow rising in confusion as he stared at Matt.

"I can hit that, but I can't hit the freakin' bull's eye?"

"Don't worry, we'll be using guns. At least your marksmanship doesn't depend on how 'awesome' you're feeling at the moment."


	3. Leap of Faith

_AN: Based on the Leap of Faith episode in NCIS. C:

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**Leap of Faith**

Warning: AU. Prussia, Austria, Mentioned!Hungary and England. No pairings. Human names used. Cross references to _Very Special Agents_.

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It was a nice day outside. The birds were singing (like always), the bees were buzzing (he finally got rid of that hive outside his door), and he wasn't working today (which meant that he can't carry a gun with him). It was the perfect day and he had set it aside to go out with his co-workers, who just happened to be his friends, and get drunk.

But _noooo_, he couldn't do that because his boss pulled him aside and told him that it was time for his bimonthly psych check. And so that was why Gilbert was sitting in a dimly lit room surrounded by expensive leather sofas, trying not to get sucked into hell because of said leather sofas.

Not that… he _honestly_ thought that he was going to hell…

It was just a figure of speech. Honest.

"Mr. Beilschmidt?"

Gilbert looked up from his struggling, red eyes staring up at the therapist with a slight glare. He twisted his body, tried throwing himself out of the chair, but to no avail. The chair held onto him like an obsessed ex-lover. He took a deep breath and said, "What the hell is this made of? Stuffed with beans or something?"

"With the way you're acting it doesn't really matter." The other said curtly and by his accent, Gilbert could tell that his new psychiatrist was Austrian. Damnit, he already misses his old therapist and he only just met the guy.

"Let's just get this over with so that you can get out of that chair." He said as he took a seat on the other side of his patient. Gilbert sniggered at the look of shock on the man's face when he too sunk into his chair.

"I guess we're both stuck." The detective taunted, trying to get himself comfortable as the therapist pulled out a paper from his file. He tipped his head to the side as the other scribbled something down onto his paper.

"I'm charging you for overtime."

"Wait! What!"

"I'm Doctor Edelstein."

"Wait!"

Roderich ignored him, used to the other man's cries of protest from growing up with a nice batch of obnoxious cousins. He had time to perfect his ability to tune out voices. It was near perfect now… "Your old psychiatrist, Miss Héderváry, wrote in your file that you don't tend to sleep—"

"You wouldn't be sleeping too if you had my job." Gilbert said, voice unusually soft. There was a small knit in his brows and Roderich noticed that vacant look on the detective's face. Gilbert took in a shaky breath, dragged a hand over his face to clear away those thoughts and looked Roderich right in the eyes. "I had to deal with a lot of freaks and don't get me wrong—I _love_ my job! _Mein Gott_ do I love my job… it's just…" He trails off, hangs his head to shield the puzzled look on his face from prying eyes. "_Gott_, I don't know how those guys in S-V-U handle their jobs."

Doctor Edelstein taps his fingers along the cover of Gilbert's file. He looks down at it, makes a mental note to himself to call Miss Héderváry and ask her about the contents. It shouldn't be this thin at the rate that Gil was going at. "What about the guys in S-V-U?"

Gil looks up, surprise on his face at Roderich's voice, and he ruffles up his hair. "My little brother works in the unit." He says with a shrug of his shoulders. He rests his elbow on his knees and looks off to the side, eyes looking out of the only window in the room. "He deals with freaks a lot more creepy than my freaks."

"How does he deal with the stress of his job?"

"He talks to me." Gilbert looks over to Roderich for a split second. If he had blinked, he would have missed that worried glint mixed in with the red of his eyes. Gil looks down at his hand, the bandage wrapped around it from where the glass shrapnel cut into him when a bullet smashed into the glass above him. He looks over to his therapist again, a hard glint in his eyes. "I can't talk to him." He says, reading the man's thoughts before he could voice them. "He has enough shit to take care of. I'm his big brother. I need to take care of him. Not the other way around."

"So that's why you're the only one in therapy." Edelstein mumbled to himself as he jotted some things down onto the paper in front of him. He sets the things down onto the side table and clasps his hands onto his lap. "Talking seems to be helping your brother. Whom do you usually talk to?"

"Miss Héderváry." He paused, thought something over in his mind. "We don't usually talk though."

_He skips._ The Austrian could just tell by the way the other was moving. Jerky movements and the slightest furrow in his brows as Gil tries to remember those times that he did spend with her. Roderich could only wonder if he'll try to skip on these sessions too. "Anybody else you can or do talk you? Best friends?"

"Both of my best friends are in the same squad as me. It's kind of an unspoken rule that we don't talk about our jobs or what happened on our jobs on our free time."

"Ah… I see. What's the worst thing you ever experienced on the job then?"

Gil looks at him in surprise, shoulders tense for some reason. They stare at each other for a few more seconds and Roderich watches as the tenseness leaves the other as he sinks into his chair.

Gilbert scratches his head and laughs. "Kesese… that's a pretty hard question." He looks off the side, an odd grin on his face. "It might be the one where this man took a kid, a little girl, as a hostage. Wouldn't cooperate, shot her in the head and than killed himself before anybody could shot." He falls silent, a grimace on his face and shakes his head. "Nooo… that's not the worst."

"Which one's the worst?"

"Leap of Faith."

"Leap of Faith?"

"Yeah, that's what me and my friends call it." The Prussian says. He shrugs again, squirms a bit in his chair, the damn thing still sucking him down. "This Marine was on the roof of this hotel about to jump off. He refused to say anything about himself at first so I tried getting Arthur to snap a picture of him to get him in the search database. Damn guy wussed out when a butterfly came at him." Gil laughed at the memory. That guy just totally freaked out and jumped off the ladder and sprained his foot in the landing and scrapped his temple and elbow. "I had to get the picture myself."

"So what else happened?"

"Ah… learned that the guy was going through a divorce. He was losing his hair too." Gil added with a snicker, glad that he got some good genes in him. "Had a little sister. Just thirteen years old and there was her big brother about to jump off a roof." He paused, a small frown on his face. Thought back to when he called her to tell her the news about her brother. Kid cried.

"He jumped off?"

"Nope."

"Wha—"

"Talked about his little sister. Guy felt bad about leaving her behind and made a move to come back. Right when he was about to grab my hand, somebody shot him." Gilbert rubbed his temple, the memory invoking a small headache. "Kiku told me, in the autopsy report, that he died from the bullet before he hit the ground."

"Oh… did you find out who killed him?"

Gil rubbed his neck, red eyes looking out the window again. "Wife hired somebody. He was a Marine, working on something important. If he died, the death benefits would have been good and she needed to kill him before the divorce. She was tight on money, a druggie." He looked over to Roderich, smiled at the speechless look on the man's face. "Felt nice to get that off my back. I should do that more often."

"I'm sorry…"

"Kesese… about the Leap of Faith? Don't be. It's part of my job. I chose it after all."

Both men stared at each other, nothing really going through their minds. Doctor Edelstein stared down at his wrist; the watch wrapped around it, and noticed that the two hours was over. "Oh… Mr. Beilsch—"

"Time's up already? That was pretty fast." He lets out a laugh, flung his body out of the chair and landed on the ground with a loud _thump_. He gets up laughing, rubbing his sore bum before throwing a playful glare at the chair. Gil looks at his psychiatrist, a smirk on his face. "Need some help?"

"No, there's another session coming in five minutes. They can help me out then."

"Okay then, see you in two months, Doc."

"Of course. Oh! Mr. Beilschmidt!"

"Yeah?"

"You're a… good Special Agent and a good person…"

Gilbert stares at him, tips his head to the side before laughing. "Of course I'm a good person and a good Special Agent! I'm _awesome_." He punctuated the last statement with a solid thump to his chest. "But whatever, thanks I guess." Roderich doesn't miss the small smile on his face before it was hidden in a ratty old scarf.


	4. Revolution

_AN: I spent waaay too long writing this. xD Set to the tune of Revolution sung by the Kagamine twins. Everything is singable. Used SuriOokami's lyrics as the basis._

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**Revolution**

Warnings: Song parody. Canada, Prussia. No pairings.

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(Canada)

Everybody is watching them, and we get no show time  
though we're their brothers, no one seems to notice us  
so the time has come to rise and let ourselves be known.  
There'll be an uprising, a re-vo-lution (-tion… -tion… -tion…)

(Prussia)

The first one'll be,  
none other than me,  
Gallant and oh-so awesome,  
Gilbert Beilschmidt!

I'm so cool,  
like a little bird,  
aiming and fighting conquering those vital regions!

Wait a second, HOLD UP!  
Pitiful and pathetic?  
Give your respects to me you crazy little bastards!

Prussia or East? Who do they think?  
I'm the great kingdom of Prussia all the way!

I can still fight to the end,  
so just get out of my way!  
Don't compare me to my brother West!

Just give me a gun~  
I'll show you how much of a crackshot I can be,  
Just give me something!  
Whatever it'll be it can still be a weapon.

(Both)

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

(Canada)

Well, the family seems to be an odd one,  
people who seem to forget me, is that supposed to happen?

Papa, papa, can't we have a normal day?  
Please get your hands out of Arthur's pants!

Much more badass than Alfred could ever be,  
everybody still keeps mistaking me for him.  
But making Alfred cry won't do any of us well,  
and Kumapacki still doesn't remember me!

Come here, just here, our motto that they'll hear,  
is now, **(both) OK, ****differentiate**.

Inside my heart, I have to keep faith,  
Just listen to me, I'm not my friggin' brother!

The overshadowed brothers are always standing **(both) tall  
**  
(Prussia)

Flames in the hearts of the people who share our **(both) strife**  
like a Prussian solider we stand against the masses,  
prepared for anything, so that our enemy's in pain! (Kesesese)

(Canada)

For those who stand with us,  
we promise that we won't walk in our brother's shadow  
and siblings rejoice,  
'cuz we're finally going to get the credit we deserve.

(Both)

Sisters, good job! Revolution!  
We know the Sibling's revolution only begun.

Brothers, good job! Revolution!  
We know the Sibling's revolution only begun.

Creators, good job! Revolution!  
We know the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So fans, good job! Revolution!  
We know the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the Sibling's revolution only begun.

So here we go, we'll let'em know,  
that the

Sibling's revolution,  
Sibling's revolution,  
Sibling's revolution,  
only begun, (Canada) eh!

(Prussia)  
Kesese…


	5. Just a Little Peek

**Just a Little Peek**

Warnings: AU. Hungary, Vietnam, Taiwan, Greece, and China. No pairings. Human names used.

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"Miss Elizabeta!" A short and lean woman called out from behind her desk. She waved to the lady, saw the flower clip that she had bought for her the day before nestled into her brown hair. Linh smiled and quickly walked up to the other woman, a small bag in her hand. Linh looked over her shoulder, noticed the confused and bewildered look on Meimei's face from where she sat behind her own desk, and motioned to her younger partner to approach. Meimei hesitated before diving underneath her desk and Linh held back a sigh. _Honestly, this probation period is getting on everybody's nerves- especially the senior field agents. _Linh thought to herself as she tapped her shoes against the ground, impatiently waiting for Meimei to grab whatever it was she was fumbling with. _Makes all the rookies so nervous. _"I'm so sorry Miss Elizabeta. There's something we both want to give you." She said, turning over to look at the Hungarian. To her surprise, Elizabeta was holding back her chuckles.

The Hungarian rubbed her face, trying to clear her face to achieve the wanted _professional _look. It didn't work. Especially when Meimei started walking over and got her jacket caught on something on her desk. That look on Linh's face was absolutely hilarious. "Ah, it's okay. I don't mind." She called out, trying to rock back and forth on her heels. It doesn't work when you're in high heels. "Though I'm not too sure about my driver. He's probably getting a bit mad now~" Her lips quirked up into a grin as the senior tried to get the rookie's jacket untangled while apologies kept coming forth from both agents. _Hard to believe they're both FBI agents. _She mused to herself as she watched Linh give Meimei a little scolding. She will definitely remember her first meeting of them. Meimei, the poor girl, flashed her badge, but it was upside down. Linh was so disappointed she promptly squatted down and hid her face in shame.

_But they are FBI agents. Very compentent ones at that. _Elizabeta reminded herself, a small statement meant to calm her nerves, but she realized that it was true. She grimaced, remembering the ransom-kidnapping attempt on her and she wondered if her job made her that made her liable for all this or if it was just her person. She hoped that it was her job, at least she can change that. Though she hoped that Linh and Meimei wouldn't be changing their jobs any time soon...

It all started normal, just a simple drive to a hotel to discuss something with another CEO with her two bodyguards bickering with each other. Somewhere along the way, she went on a private trip to the bathroom and get kidnapped along the way (they were damn lucky she didn't piss herself at that moment). She was very surprised to see Linh and Meimei just thirty minutes later when they pulled open the top of her crate (Who the hell stuffs a person in a crate anyways?). She was also very surprised to see the bodies the two had bust through and when she learned there was an assassination attempt on the hotel room (but Meimei had bullet proof panes installed just in case for that, so nobody got hurt). _Linh was so pissed off at the end of the day._ Elizabeta recalled, flinching at the memory of the longwinded lecture she recieved. At the end though, Linh gave her her own (and trusted) stun gun while Meimei bought her a pair of brass knuckles and a shrill whistle.

She honestly had no idea what to do with the whistle. Seriously. But it was a nice thought.

"Miss Liz?" Meimei's voice snapped Elizabeta out of her remeniscing.

"What's up?"

"Just a... goodbye present." She mumbled, a shy smile on her face as she handed over a little plastic toy. Elizabeta stared at the purple thing, didn't know what she was supposed to think. Whatever it was looked like it was stolen from a Happy Meal from McDonald's. Elizabeta stared at her. Meimei twiddled with the ripped end of her jacket before picking up the tiny thing. "It's multi-purpose." She explained. She pointed to the little button protruding from its head. "It's mostly for decoration though. This is the on and off button. Press that and it'll move, make noises, and activate the other functions. But it's pretty much the 'Just-look-cute' button." Meimei pulled off its tail and Elizabeta blinked, staring at the cord that was coiled and hidden in its body. "This is a microphone and a... cell phone... like... thingy. To dail, pull off both of its legs," And she did just that, revealing a little pull-out dial hidden underneath the microphone cord. "Just pull it out like those handicap table top things and-"

Meimei stopped, looked over to Linh for help. The Vietnamese lady shrugged and Meimei stuck her tongue out at her. _Big help she is._ She bitterly thought to herself. _What the hell did I just do? _She looked back at Elizabeta, didn't know she said that was so funny. "Miss-"

"It's nothing." The Hungarian resured, feeling much like a mother soothing a young child. A chuckle slipped past her lips and she pulled the younger into a bear hug. She didn't notice Meimei craning her head to look at her senior, her mouth moving to ask for help as Linh shrugs again. She pulled away, still held Meimei by the shoulders, took delight in how the other just seems so... frazzled and out of it. Out of her element. "No need to explain, I'm not some old woman that needs to be coached through everthing. I'll figure out the rest on my own. It's more fun that way. Thank you though!" She looked over to Linh lingering in the distance. "If you want something do it now," She advised, releasing the rookie and approaching her senior. Elizabeta held back a snort of laughter when Linh took a step away. "Come on girl! I have to go now!"

"Ahhh... yes! Of course! Um..." She hastily pulled out a champagne bottle from her bag and quickly handed it to Elizabeta. Linh shuffled out of bear hugging reach. "Just a little drink to make the plane trip shorter." Linh explained in a rush, her skinny hands waving around in the air. Meimei has never seen her so nervous. Though that's probably because that Elizabeta can sure give one hell of a hug. Owww... her ribs hurt just thinking about going through that again.

"Aw, how'd you know that this is my favorite brand?" Elizabeta cooed as she gazed lovingly at the bottle's label. "Let me guess, benefits of being a FBI agent?" She let out an airy laugh, missing the guilty exchange of glances between the two agents. "Ah, who cares? Thank you!" She reached forward to pull Linh into a hug, but the small Asian dove out of the way. Elizabeta tried again, Linh dodged again. She tried again, she failed again. Both stared at each other before Elizabeta put a hand onto her hip.

"It's uh... against my religion to um... intimately touch people. Yeah. That's it."

Her mouth opened to say something about that utter bullcrap, but her mouth snapped shut when she remembered her driver. Damn. She looked at her watch. Damn. Ten minutes late. "Sorry huns, but I have to go." She placed the champagne bottle into her bag along with the gift from Meimei. She waved them one last goodbye, everybody knowing that they wouldn't be seeing each other for a while. In one minute, she was out of the building and heading to the airport.

Linh sighed.

"Well... that's over with."

"Oh... now you jinxed it Linh!"

"Don't tell me that you believe in all that bullsh-"

"Would you like to finish that sentence Agent Nguyen?"

A lovely shade of red spread across her face and neck at the sight of a male, a scowl on his face and his usually neat black hair was all ruffled up and sticking up in odd places. She assumed that their medical examiner got to him. She said no words, just watched him walk past her and over to Meimei. He stared at her for a little bit, seemed like a silent conversation to Linh before Meimei blurted out, "Why are you looking at me, boss?" Linh watched as Yao's expression fell, apparently his efforts at telepathy failing and he walked over to Linh again. She tipped her head to the side as he stopped in front of her. Seemed like he was looking for something... "Um, boss? Lost your glasses or something?"

Yao stared at her oddly before frowning hard at her. "You know I don't wear glasses, aru."

She frowned. "Boss... it was an expression."

"Oh. Yeah... yeah..." He left the sentence unfinished, something else on his mind. He pulled his sleeve up, stared at his watch before looking up to the clock mounted up. "Is Miss Héderváry using the bathroom?" He asked at last, moving again, but this time heading towards one of the desks. Meimei and Linh shared glances before walking over to his desk. Yao didn't miss the look and he frowned at them. "What? She isn't using the bathroom? The driver has other people he has to drive too, aru."

"But... boss... she just left."

"Left? To where?"

"The airport."

"With an imposter..."

All three just looked at each other blankly, a mixture of different emotions flickering past the Meimei's and Linh's eyes while Yao's remained cold. Both woman look down at the ground and Yao notices that Meimei looks very close to tearing out her hair in an angry fit. He coughed into his fist, snapping the two out of their shock induced trance before looking at them intently. "What are you two waiting for, aru?" He snapped. "An invitation? Find out where that car's going now, aru." He got up and walked off, the others already at their desks and working on finding out just where the Hungarian disappeared to.

He stopped by the stairways and fished his cell phone out of his pocket and flipped it open. He watched the screen lit up, his fingers poised over the numbers. He stared at it for a little bit longer before putting it back into his pocket. "They won't need the help." Yao told himself heading towards the elevator. He presses the button and both Linh and Meimei join him. He stares at Meimei and notices that she still wears the flowers in her hair. "Agent Lee." Meimei looks at him in surprise before nervously twiddling with her fingers.

"Yes boss?"

"If you're here, who's back working at the desks, aru?"

"That would be Heracles." Linh said, jerking her head in the Greek's direction. Yao looked over his shoulder, saw the man typing feverishly away at the computer before he looked up. The man smiled, a lazy kind of a grin before turning his full attention back to the keyboard and the numerous things flashing past the screen. Yao felt a twinge of pity for the man. _Looks like I should be finding a partner for him soon. _"It would be nice to have one more person working there, aru." He said, staring at Meimei specifically.

He missed the glance shared between his two female agents.

The elevator door opened and before he could take a step forward, Meimei shoved him backwards with a small grunt as Linh rushed into the elevator, tugged Meimei into it too. He blinked at the two, the elevator door quickly closing. "What the hell are you guys doing, aru?" He snapped, very tempted to wedge his scrawny fingers against the closing slides and push them apart. But then again, it's man versus machine... who's going to win? He does not have the time to nurse a couple of broken fingers. He heard the laughter of Heracle's as Linh and Meimei salute him and they were gone.

"Hey boss... guess you're gonna help me here."

"Wipe that smirk off your face, did you find the location, aru?"

"Why yes I di- Dammit. Maybe Meimei was right to about how things can be jinxed." Heracles mumbled to himself, eyes narrowing as he tried to pull up the coordinates again. Yao bit back a loud groan of frustration, walked over to the big plasma screen and motioned at it. Heracles nodded and what was on his computer was up there. "The bastard turned off her cell phone." He looked back down and pulled out the small compartment drawer from his desk. He rummaged through it, let out a little '_Ah_' when he found the small device and fixed it against his ear. He tapped it once and then his fingers flew back to the keyboard. "Linh? Meimei? Can you guys hear me? Okay, okay, that's good. The bastard turned off the cell phone, but do you guys have visual?" He asked, narrowing down the perimeters that impostor could be in. "Oh, you don't? Dammit, okay, head over to Abbey Street and then make a left turn into Scrutenel. Meimei should know, she's been there a couple of times already. That's where we lost him."

"_Wait, wait, wait! You're tracking her from her phone GPS right?"_

"Ur, correct. He turned the phone-"

"_I know, I know. Um... check the GPS... thingy for my present to her. It should be GPS enabled, twenty four-seven."_

The Greek blinked, tilted his head to the side, but didn't say anything else. Yao watched as he quickly typed down something his eyes couldn't catch and he looked back up at the large screen, a small smile on his face. Never would he think that he would be so pleased to see a circle with a blinking red dot in the middle. He tapped his communicator, heard the faint noise of tires squealing in the background and knew that Linh had ran a red light... again. "The target stopped, Agent Karpusi is going to send you the coordinates now." He gave a quick nod to the man behind the computer. "And by the way, when we're all back to normal... we're going to have a little talk, aru."

Meimei flipped open her phone, braced herself for the sharp turn when Linh handled the car as they made a sharp turn. She relaxed into her seat, eyes still trained onto her screen before she looked up, caught the sight of the street sign. _Scrutenel_... "Linh, Linh! We're here! Stop!" And just like that, the car jerked to a stop before starting again, Linh parking in a more appropriate area. Meimei was the first one out of the car, knew that she would be the one driving them back home.

She stood where she was, looked around and felt the blood drain out of her face. So many places they could be, so many buildings, and so many hiding places. She snapped out of her trance as her partner bumped into her shoulder. "I..." She was silenced by the look sent her way and brown eyes drifted to the gun clutched in Linh's hand. She got the message, pulled out her own gun too. "You found her?" She whispered, quickly matching the Vietnamese's step for step.

"No, but we don't know who we're dealing with. He might have set us-" Linh stopped, her eyes looking around the place. "Did you..." She nibbled on her bottom lip, wondered if what she heard was just a trick of the wind. And then it sounded again, a shrill high-pitched whistling noise. Both women stared at each other before they started running towards the source of the noise, place barren of activity aside from the usual ships sitting chained to the deck. The noise came again, and again before it stopped. And then the screams started.

Prominent sounds that lasted for at least five seconds before disappearing and starting up again. Like a broken record. Her heart was in her throat, ready to leap out at any moment. Meimei wanted to tear her hair out, didn't know whose screams they were, what was causing them, how badly hurt Elizabeta was. They neared the vehicle, a black SUV, and Meimei would have joked about how she expected a man to show up and offer them candy to get into it... but that didn't seem appropriate at the time.

Actually, it doesn't seem appropriate PERIOD.

Brown eyes met brown eyes in a brief glance and then Meimei opened the door. Both jumped back, a body falling out and onto the ground, the two guns of the agents already pointing at the body. Linh stared as the male seemed to have a seizure and looked up into the car. There was Miss Elizabeta, in her lovely business suit with her brown hair still looking as perfect as ever, her knees bent as she pointed the stun gun at her kidnapper. Both agents watched in silence as she pressed the button, teeth grinding against each other in anger, and her poor kidnapper was given another electric shock. Elizabeta let out a snort and pressed the button again. Meimei tipped her head to the side, not too sure how to react to the scene. "Miss... Liz?"

"I'll give him to you in a minute, girls! Just..." There was another grunt from Elizabeta as she sent another course of electricity through the man's body. "Just after I'm finished with him-AND DON'T LOOK UP MY SKIRT!" She snapped, pressing the trigger and causing the man to spaz out again. Linh cringed at the tone in her voice and made a note to never anger Miss Héderváry under any conditions. She watched in a sadistic type of amusement as another voltage attack was sent to the man. "No... it's okay Miss Elizabeta. Shock him to your content. Nobody's in a rush today."

And all the way back at the FBI headquarters, Yao was trying to fight off his potential migraine. He looks over to Heracles before shaking his head. "Do you think Agent Nguyen knows that her mic is on?"

Heracles shrugged before getting up, stretched out the muscles in his body. "Not my concern." Was his simple reply before he walks off, rubbing the small of his back.


	6. Days of the Past

_AN: I blame that picture of Prussia being stripped. He just looked so... Uwah. And another picture of Prussia I found on Himaruya's blog. Entry number... 212. That little icon. Somebody needs to make a plz account out of it. xD_  
_Warnings: PruCan, sexual references, Noto-sama 5 references, Flustered!Prussia, and Teasing!Matthew._

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It was a nice day out, the sky was a bit cloudy and sure it was a bit windy, but the breeze brought along a crisp cleanliness… or at least at the moment. The weather channel had said that there was going to be rain latter in the evening, which was when they usually took Kumajiro out for a walk. They being the 'nice, little, gay couple that lives down the street.'

Well, today only one-half of the pair had gone out. Gilbert had left early in the morning, bent on being the first one into that new café and decided to bring Kumajiro along. "_Kill two birds with one stone_," He had said as he closed the door behind him. Which would leave behind Matthew, who sat swathed in layers upon layers of turtlenecks and jackets to battle the biting and snarling morning frost. Where was his shield to help battle against the cold? Oh yeah, the heater was still broken.

_Just shows to go that you can't trust Gilbert with small little blessings._ The blonde mused to himself over his cup of frothing hot chocolate (He just wasn't in the mood for coffee at the moment). With one gloved hand he stirred the chocolate, occasionally stopping to munch on some mini marshmallows (They're just nasty when they're soaked) and in his other hand were a bunch of envelopes.

Mostly bills, but he's been getting a letters from a mystery source. It all started suddenly on a sweet note, the person acting as if they've known each other for all their lives and the Canadian just decided to play along. Though a few weeks back, when he got that picture of Antonio being stripped of his clothing… he had no doubt that he actually knew them.

Just forgot about them.

Oh the irony!

Matthew took another sip of his chocolate as he picked up the latest letter, dated a few days back. A frown pulled at his lips as he got up to go get the scissors, thin gloves rubbing against each other to keep their contents warm. _Maybe I should just burn the picture now…_ He thought to himself as he went back to the kitchen table, scissors in hand. He glared at the letter, debating with himself. He could just burn it now and save himself from seeing his old classmates in those humiliating situations, but then he'll end up burning the actual note in the envelope.

_Maybe I can just get the note out…_ He started cutting off the edge, fingers ready to pull it out when they faltered. _Then again… they did tape the picture onto the bottom of the note. Poor Feliciano, he looked absolutely horrified._ A loud groan forced itself past his lips as he scrubbed at his face in frustration. _Just great, just great. What do I do? _Matt cast a quick glance over his shoulder, expecting his lover to burst through that door at any second and demand to know what the hell he's doing.

How the hell do you tell your lover and best friend that you saw incriminating pictures of your friends during school years?

Yeah, that's a trick question, you don't.

He looked back to the letter and took a deep breath. Nothing like breathing deeply to steel your nerves for the unfortunate fool who managed to get bounded and stripped down to their underwear (or beyond). He bit his bottom lip as he pulled out the largest content, surprise clearly written on his face when he realized that it had only a few sentences. One of them being, "_You might want to be careful._'

Now that peaked his curiosity. _I might want to be careful?_ He stared at the tiny portion of the photo peaking out from underneath its envelope. Somewhere along with the excitement slinking through his veins, a smile had appeared as he pulled the photo out. His eyes slipped closed…

_You don't have to do this if you don't want to._

_Nobody will think any less of you._

_Except Alfred if he ever finds out._

_Maybe Gil too…_

_Screw this I'm looking._ And with that he pulled out the photo and took a long… good… look at it. Or at least he tried to; it's very difficult to do when you're staring at that thing like it was a complex math problem.

He just stared at it, his mind chasing the thing like a dog chasing its own tail. His lips quirked into a little smirk and he brought the photo closer to his eyes, blue eyes looking over his glasses. His smirk grew even bigger. "Oh my God." Matthew mumbled, mirth in his tone as he set the picture down and rubbed his face again. He stole another peek at it. "Oh… my… God. Gil… you look rather nice… like that."

"I look rather nice like what?"

_Oh man._ Matthew looked over his shoulder, could easily see that smug smirk on Gil's face as he sheds off his winter coat, hanging it up onto the coat rack. _Oh my God._ Dammit, stupid picture. Goddamn stupid picture with the oh-so molest-able Gil. Freaking tight pants, they weren't this tight when he put them on this morning.

"Hey, you okay? Your face is pretty red."

"I'm fine." Matthew replied, hiding his smile behind his hand as Gil pulls up a chair next to him. Matthew pulls his legs together, the lower extremities of his body feeling rather uncomfortable. "So how was the walk?" He asked, voice coming out a bit strained as he tried to push the mental image of the picture of his mind.

Wait. The picture.

It's on the table.

Face-up.

Curses in both English and Canadian-French ran through his mind as Gil picked up the picture. It was like one of those old fashion movies where it was all slow-mo and people really focus on portraying expressions on their faces. Those horribly exaggerated expressions.

Different emotions flashed past Gil's face as he suddenly realized just what that picture was. Honestly, Matthew was surprised. He never saw that many emotions in those eyes before. Correction, he never saw pure unadulterated horror mixed in with some other non-important feelings in those red eyes.

"Matt? Where'd you get this?" He asked, words slow and deliberate as he continued staring at the candid photo of him being stripped. God, all those bad memories. Those really bad memories, especially when Elizabeta appeared when he was naked. _Naked_! All five meters of him just hanging out there in the open. _Fuck my life._ The albino swallowed thickly before shoving it back over to Matt, red eyes squeezed shut to keep out the bad times. "Throw this out."

Matt took it back, staring at the picture, the smile still on his face. "I like it." He admitted, eyes staring at the flushed face of the younger Gil. Gosh, if only he made that face once in awhile. Even when they were roleplaying… _Oh woah, what's that?_ He brought it closer to his face. _Oh WOAH._ "That's… so cute. Are you crying?"

"Shut up!"

"Wow, I never knew you shaved that low. When'd you stop?"

"_Matt!_"

"Hmn… if only they got the picture of you completely naked. That'll be a nice treat."

"I should leave right now. I should."

"Huh… it would be a lot better if I was the one with my hands on your boxers though." He commented casually enough, stiffly bringing one of his legs to rest on his knee. Argh, it's _still_ there. Wait. Matt brought the picture closer to his face again, focusing on the black underwear. "Are those boxers, briefs, or boxer-briefs?"

No response.

"Gil?"

"Y-You!" Matthew looked up to the base of the stairs where Gilbert stood, his usually pale face aflame from embarrassment. He jabbed an accusatory finger in the blonde's direction as more stuttered words came out of his mouth. He waggled his finger at his lover, the blonde propping his head up to watch in amusement as Gil's blush deepened. "Y-You are taking care of that _boner_ by yourself! Don't come to me for help!"

With that said, he marched up the stairs, Matthew's laughter echoing over and over in his ear.


End file.
